


A Destiel walks into a bar

by TheAssbuttOfCassbutt



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Did not mean to write this piece of shit, Drug-induced fic, Forgive Me, M/M, i had literally just come out of hospital when i wrote this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-22 05:47:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9586430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAssbuttOfCassbutt/pseuds/TheAssbuttOfCassbutt
Summary: Dean takes Cas to a bar and Cas soon gets too drunk to stand so Dean has to carry him back to the bunker where Sam awaits... Warning: Absolute crack-fic that makes absolutely no sense.





	

Dean walked into the bar with his friend. "Ouch" they said in unison as they shook their heads and walked around it and into the local dive.

They looked around for somewhere to siit but it was crowdes so Cas sat on Dean's lap in the corneer. Dean frowned beacause he wasn't gay but it was Cas so it was okay.

They ordered seven beer each and Cas drank it all at once. DSean was amazed so he bought every drink they had for Cas because he scammed a new credid card with a million pound and he spent it all on the angal.

Cas got super drunk real quidkly and leaned against Dean which made him happy because it meant that they werre best bros. He wasn't gayy or anythig.

At 4am Dean decuded it was very late and they went home but Cas couldn't walk propely so dean had to carry him all the way back to the bunker because he accidentally left baby there and they had waked 12 miles to get here. And Cas was ver heavy because he was as fat as the Christle building but Daen couldn't see that becase he was angel blind.

They were amlost at the bunker when Cas threw up everywhere and all over Dean and Dean got very angrwy and shouted at Cas so the anelg went really quet but then Dean felt bad,

"OH MY GOD CAS i'M SO SORRY i didN'T MEan To UPSET YOU pLEASE FORGive me don'TN HATE me liKE SAMMEE Does. Do YOU LiKE Lucifer MORE THAN mE ToO?!" he shoyed.

Cas ignord him and Dean startd cryig,

"i'M SORRy Cass" He apologised and then he did a sad face emoticon in real life.

Then Cas felt bettr and forgave him. They kissed but then Casteil threw up again and dean threew up in his moutj and they swallowed it and laighed,

"i love you" said Dane.

Cas couldnt speak becaude he was drunk but Dean knew Cas was gay for him too so he smiled and they carried on walking.

They finally made it after five minutes and went inside after Dean kissed Cas again very lousdly and Sam was leaning agavnst the door listening to them and he fell on he floor.

"What wee you doing sammy?" adked Deane.

Same panicked and screaned "NOTHiNG!" he lied.

Dean freowned serious-like but he beleved him because Samey waa his baby brother and they wood never ever lie to each other.

He took Casstiel to a spare room and put hin on the bed but Cas drgged him doen onto the bed and they did the sex for 3 hours and Sam heard them which made him throw up and then Dean fwll asleep and Cas became sober becaue he was a gracious angel and the waked Den up and asked what had happened...

Dean was sad that Cas didnt rememebrg beacause they were both naked and his butt hurt so he kissed Cas and he remembered!

3 days later:

Dean was stood at the alter all nervous like as he wavted for Cass to show up he wass late!

Then, finally everyone gasped as Sam hit his head on the roof becuse he was too tall as he was walking Csss down the aisle because God didn't get an invite because he never checs his mail.

The angals dress was beautiful, it was bright green and had fairy costume wings seqwn onto the back of it because he was an angel of the lurd.

Dean gasped becauxe it was sO sexy and they kissed and said the "i do" together and ten they were husband and angel and they kissed again when the holy man with a moustache told them too. (He almost didn't let them but everyone hwo showed up was a hunter and they all pointed a guns at he and the Cas touched his floorhead and made him gay).

They kissed for an hour and no one got bored because it was truu love.

Then they lived sadly ever after because hunter's don't get happy endings.


End file.
